I've visited a few churches in my short life for various reasons. Having grown up in a small Baptist church, I wanted to see what other churches did in their services. In college, this seemed the trend among friends at least the first part of freshman year. We'd arrive and get greeted by a sweet saint stationed at the door with bulletins or what not with some quick guidance for a seat. If a conversation popped up among a member of our parents' age, the topic would get to relationships, finding a husband/wife. As freshmen in college that didn't seem to bother my circle of friends, but was a matter we trusted God to work out the details to.
Through college and finding that church that fit, these conversations tapered off unless someone who wasn't familiar with us came to church that day.
I must interject here that I do want a marriage one day that God sets. I desire a godly husband to lead a family that God should give me. I believe that this is a natural, God-honoring desire that all Christians have. I do not begrudge anyone for wanting to get to know me and asking these questions about my marital status.
That is NOT my reason for going to church.
I was raised as a preacher's kid and we went to church to be part of worshiping our great God, not expanding our social circle or possibility of a future mate. My parents never used those expressions in our church attendance. Granted, I have met some of my lifelong friends in church and have been blessed by other church members connections in the community. This should not be the sole reason we gather with other believers to worship our risen Savior.
As college ended and I started teaching, I'd get a few invites to a church or two because "there's this single guy you should meet". One friend told me of someone at their church who "wasn't much to look at, but was a solid Christian". I felt bad for this guy getting set up with this first impression put in this girl's mind. (I never did meet that guy, btw).
I so appreciate my married friends wanting to see me as happy as they are in their marriages. Yes, I desire that for myself if God has that for me.
But is that why I go to church? As a single girl, there was a time in my life that I thought the magic formula to meeting who God had for me was to find the PERFECT singles' small group at a local church. As I was going about trying to find who God had for me, I'd fall on my face in my futile attempts to bring about what I thought was a good idea. The story of Abraham and Hagar came to mind quite often.
God does have a plan for his children, sometimes it may include marriage, sometimes not.
God is still God.
Living in Korea this past year and a half, I have been wonderfully free from so many of these kinds of questions. Coming home to Arkansas I've been asked a lot of the basic questions about life in Korea including those about relationship status. When I get asked this within ten minutes of reuniting with someone, it's a quick reminder of where I am again.
Yeah, I hope that God has that in His plan for me someday soon. But there's more than that going on with this girl.
